Seeing the Inner Camel in Every Cow

I'll be the first to tell you that the last month has been pretty rough and I'm pretty glad it's about over. Having said that, I'll also tell you that every time I think that, I hear my great grandmother saying "You're wishing your life away..." and I know. She's right. But some days are just rough. And some months are rougher. This last week, I ran across a great quote that really hit home:

"For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

That made a whole heck of a lot of sense to me. Of course, by the end of that day, after working with teenagers for eight hours, I was worn out and some of that roughness from the month started seeping back in to my field of view. Here I was, exhausted, and here I was, due at the church to work with more teenagers for bible study. No time for rest right now. I drive up and it's hot and I'm hungry and every child I'm supposed to work with is late. Finally, everyone is there and I begin telling our bible story for the day, about Moses and the Israelites at Mount Sinai. Moses has been up on that mountain, working out a covenant with God and rules for people who said they'd follow those rules (but are breaking them as Moses speaks). And my kids are squirming, they're throwing things at each other, and I'm constantly telling them to put up their cell phones until we're finished. Oh, I can relate with Moses. Don't these people see the importance of listening right now? Don't they see the work I'm trying to do? The sacrifices I'm making, just for them? I've no sooner come off my proverbial mountain than they're dancing and singing around golden cellular devices. Moses throws the stone tablets. I tell these hooligans put their phones up. Now. When we finally arrive at the end of my story for the day, it's time to illustrate what we learned in our bible journals (we draw pictures of the story of the day and eventually we'll look at the whole bible, in our own pictures, not just words). Half the kids can't be coralled long enough to get anything drawn and I'm about done in. That's when one little boy leans over to me and asks me, amongst the chaos, with great gravity: "Ma'am?... Is it ok if my golden calf looks more like a golden camel?"

Oh, maybe on another day it would have gotten a smile out of me, but on this day, I just about died laughing. That's when I decided we should take a look at our other pictures. Flipping through their journals, I ask them what each pictures represents. There's the drawing of Lot and his family fleeing Gomorrah, and there's Lot's wife drawn, half salt shaker and half human.

There's Noah with his Ark full of animals, including a "zonkey." Half zebra. Half donkey.

On another page, here's Jacob, about to cheat Esau out of his father's blessing with naught but a warm supper. Jacob has a voice bubble saying "Hi Dad!" and there's Isaac responding with a wisdom-filled, loving statement of "Soup!"

Farther back, there's Abraham. I vaguely remember telling the kids months ago that God told Abraham he'd have a son with Sarah. In their doubt, however, Sarah arranges for Abraham to have a child with Hagar. I told the kids that sometimes we try speed God's work along for Him and that's not what faith is about. Now I will forever remember this story as a crayon drawing with stick figures -Abraham standing between two women, looking at Hagar and a big voice bubble covering the page from God saying "No, not that one!"

I believe that God was quietly reminding me if I'm not careful, I'm going to trade a lot of precious moments of happiness for minutes of anger, and I don't have to. He's showing me that yes, sometimes our best laid plans get more confused than a panel interview at the Tower of Babel. He's showing me that yes, God is about loving people that are hard to love, living a life that's not easy to live, and carrying us when we can't walk on our own anymore, but he's also about joy and laughing and looking at faith through the eyes of a child.

Hey. Sometimes you mean to draw a calf and sometimes you get a camel.

Or a zonkey.

A Dog's Life

What is it about a dog that endears them to us. I believe it is the fact that they accept us. They don't care what we look like or what kind of mood we are in - they just love us.

The greeters at our churches should be as glad to see the people who come through the doors. Ok, so the jumping and face licking would probably not go over so well, but the sheer joy of seeing you again is amazing.

Even if you have just gone in the other room for a few minutes, they are thrilled when you re-enter the room.

It often feels like we need to act a certain way of live a certain way, in order to be accepted in the church. If we go back to the Bible, Christ accepted people where they were. He didn't heal only the elite and he didn't only associate with the affluent.

One of the first things that we need to do, though is to accept ourselves. We need to know that being single is not a disease. It is the place that we are in our lives. Christ knows us and loves us right where we are today. He knows our desires and our needs. He also knows what plans He has for us and where we need to be in our lives in order best fulfill that role.

We also need to be careful not to judge others. We need to understand that everyone has something that they are struggling with and we need to be sensitive to those hurts and needs. If we want to be accepted by others - we must first learn to accept others.

We need to be more open to showing love and acceptance - maybe we could take some lessons from the dogs.

Other Fish in the Sea

If I've heard it once, I've heard it at least 150 times. I've heard it when someone I liked in high school started dating another girl, I've heard it when there seemed to be no potential relationship on the horizon and I've heard it when one of my own relationships ended. "There are other fish in the sea," someone says, and I know they mean well, I really do, but that doesn't stop me from cringing every time I hear the words. There are other fish in the sea. Sometimes I respond with "if only I liked fish!" and other times I respond with "there are other fish in the sea because I keep throwing them back!" and then my frustration multiplies out of the sheer desperation of it all. Sometimes I think that there may very well be fish in the sea, but I'm fishing from a puddle and sometimes I look at friends around me getting married and think that the fish must be biting, but they're biting something like exquisite cheddar cheese and all I've got is earthworms (and yes, I've seen fish bite cheddar cheese.)

This week I've been reminded about those elusive fish again, but something a little ironic happened shortly after and I can't help but share it.

I recently bought one of Max Lucado's books called "Next Door Savior." It's been sitting on my table for several weeks and I decided it was high time to start reading it. So I open the book, and there, staring me in the face is a story about Peter, the fisherman. That's right, I said fisherman. And I rolled my eyes at that, too. More fish?! As it turns out, that's what Peter was thinking too (see Luke 5:5). Peter had been out on his fishing boat all night long and hadn't caught a thing. Lucado fleshes the story out enough for me to actually see the frustration and relate to it. Peter had been fishing all night long. I mean, the poor man probably saw everybody around him catching fish, taking fish home, and being able to live off of that, but no matter how many times he let out his nets, they came up empty. I imagine that he might have caught an occasional old and lost shoe, clump of seaweed, or yet another toad - oops sorry, that's my story! - and I imagine that he probably about cried after every false alarm. Finally, he gives up, and rows back to shore. Unsuccessful. Nothing to show for those long, cold, frustrating hours. I feel for Peter because I’m in Peter’s boat.

Then, along comes Jesus and he's actually being crowded off of the shore by huge numbers of people that have come to listen to him. Peter's boat happens to be handy. Jesus asks him to row them off the shore a little bit. Peter is bound to be exhausted, but he does as he's asked. Then Jesus looks at Peter and tells him to "Put out into deep water, and let down the nets for a catch."

I've read this story a number of times in my life, but I had never put much thought into how simple that really wasn't. If I were Peter, the last thing I would want to do is put out my nets again. I would have my heart set on just going home and calling in sick. Peter tells Jesus that he's already tried putting out his nets. He's tried it all night and there's nothing to be had. He's dejected, feels rejected and is broken hearted. Again, I feel for Peter because I know what Peter feels. But Peter does something that must have been incredibly difficult. He tells Jesus he'll do as he's asked and he puts out those nets. And he catches more fish than he can haul into the boat.

Great fishing story. But Peter's not through. Fast forward to John 21. Jesus has been laid to rest and here is Peter out on that lonesome fishing boat again. That morning of catching fish when there shouldn't have been any is a memory from a long time ago. It doesn't even matter anymore, because here is Peter and he's fished all night and he's got nothing to show for it. Again. I feel for Peter, because I'm in that same boat.

Here comes Jesus again, too. This time Peter doesn't even recognize Jesus. This strange man calls out to Peter asking him, hasn't he caught any fish? Peter's probably thinking the same thing I am - "if I hear somebody tell me there are fish in this sea one more time-". Jesus tells Peter to throw his nets over the right side of the boat "and you will find some." Once more, Peter does what makes no sense to him at all. There aren't any fish out there. It's humiliating in itself, do we have to make it harder by getting our hopes up again? But he does as he’s told and catches more fish than he can haul into his boat.

Great fishing story. What I would give to have a fishing story like that.

Just a couple of nights ago, I had those stories in mind, but I was on rock bottom again, frustrated and even angry at my current situation. I opened up my bible and I didn't know where to read or what I even needed to read, so I just flipped through the pages, waiting for "chance" to land me on the right page. Flipping, flipping, flipping - hey wait a minute. Go back to that last page. What was that? I turned back and saw scribbles filling up the side of a page and so I read there. It was the story of Paul and darn it if he wasn't out on the open seas. He's in chains because he is on his way to another trial (he's been through several at this point, see Acts 21-30) and the ship he is on is more or less lost at sea, surrounded by a storm threatening to dash them all to pieces. I feel for Paul. I'm in Paul's boat. Now, here's the odd thing. Paul didn't have to be on this boat. He actually could have gotten off scott free back there with King Agrippa and Festus at the last trial but he told them he wanted to tell his story to Caesar (Acts 26:32). Paul chose to go to trial again. He could have taken the easy way out and gone home, but he chose to go through another trial because it needed to be done. Now he's out here about to be shipwrecked and he tells the crew not to get on the lifeboats. He tells them to cut off the anchors. No use in weighing the boat down in place out there in the storm. Then the boat lands on some sandbar of an island he’s probably never heard of and certainly never planned on going to when he planned out what he wanted for his life. Turns out that the island was a good place for Paul to be (Acts 28).

Do you feel like you’re on these boats too? Do you feel like you just don’t have it in you to cast out your net again? Do you feel chained to a ship lost at stormy seas, moving from trial to trial? Jesus knows you’re tired from fruitlessly fishing all night. He says throw out your net again. Jesus knows you feel shipwrecked. Maybe that’s how he’ll get you to the right island.

People tell me there are other fish in the sea. I don’t particularly care to be out on the sea in my little boat and frankly, I’m tired of fishing. But I think that maybe, the good Lord has put some stories in front of me this week to tell me He knows what boat I’m in and thankfully, I’m not in this boat alone.

Time for Reflection

After a lesson or unit, teachers are encouraged to look back on their work, or "reflect," to see how effective their lesson was and how it could be improved upon. It's probably something we all do at one point or another regarding almost any aspect of our lives. For example, that Italian cream cake I made yesterday - was it a keeper recipe? And if the cake has already been devoured, then yes, that was probably a job well done. If the cake was just pushed around on my family's plates and gracefully never mentioned again, well, then I might need to fix something.

So today I am reflecting about this blog. It is coming close to time to talk about this thing at Roundup in Lubbock, and I'd like to have a better idea about how things are going. So once again, if you will look over there to the left, there are a few poll questions I'd like you to answer. The first is just a visitor counter. I have no real way to know to how many people check this website, so you're here, click the little visitor counter for me. Don't worry, I can't track you down, I can't trace who you are or what computer you are clicking from. I just need a head count.

Next, I'd like to know how often you check this website. If this is the first time ever to check it, there's a place for you. If you are a loyal reader and always have been, there's a place for you. If you forget this blog is here more often than not, but you still check it now and then, there's a place for you.

And last, I want to know who is reading. Wait - stop panicking - remember I'm not trying to track you down and eliminate your carefully protected anonymity! I just want to know if you're single or not. This blog was created for singles, of course, but if there are any non-single readers out there (and I think there are), you are most welcome! A lot of these blog posts could actually address needs in any one's life, not just singles'.

So there you have it. I'm reflecting on the usefulness and effectiveness of this creation. As always, feel free to leave comments if you have suggestions or just want to say something. I'm listening.

And, as always, thanks for your cooperation!